Holiday Cards-best written while slightly drunk on a half bottle of wine

The Ex-Boyfriend Holiday Card:

Hey,  I want my cufflinks back!!!!!!!!! Happy Holidays.  

The Boss Holiday Card:

"Thanks for the $100.00 bonus. I am using it to drown my sorrows while I search for another job that will hopefully pay better." Happy Holidays!

The Half-Sibling Holiday Card:

"Hope your home finds peace and prosperity in the New Year. If not, I hope that Santa brings xanax to your home."

The College friend who has become religious Holiday Card:

"Remember when we used to laugh at Ned Flanders?? Yeah..I think you are married to him. Please stop saying 'you are so blessed'  your post pregnancy baby fat has not left, your husband is unemployed and you are living with your in-laws." Happy Holidays!!