
A few weeks ago, I was introduced to a friend of a friend. A resident of Philadelphia, I made initial small talk well...about PHILLY.
Me: Oh, you are from Philadelphia, great town. Great restaurants.
Cedar: Yeah, there is a great restaurant scene. You have been before?
Me: Yeah, my ex-roommate and I took a road trip up there last Christmas to see her best girlfriend. She is a landscape architect.
(Why the hell did I even mention that????)
Cedar: Really?? I am a landscape architect.
Me: NO WAY! She works for &^^%5
Cedar: Me too! What is her name???
Me: Her name is T.B.
Cedar: Ohhh she had a really bad break up last year, the whole office was involved.
Me: Yeahhh, I know. What a jerk. She was a real mess. But she is muchhhhh better now.
Cedar: I could tell she was a mess. Oh she is better? That is great.
Me: Yeah, I guess she is dating someone.
Cedar: Really?
Me: I think he also works at &^^%5
Cedar: (laughing in a strained way) Do you know his name?
Me: No, but I think he moved to Upstate NY.
Silence.
Cedar: Do you know how long..do you know how long EXACTLY they have been dating?
Me: Ughhh 8 months. Yes, that is right.
Clicking of mad text messaging ensues..
Her phone starts blowing up with text messages.
Awkward silence now.
These pretzels are making me thirsty.
These pretzels are making me thirsty.

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